sober

It's NOT "New Year, New Me." It's... By Alyson Premo

It's NOT "New Year, New Me"

It's New Year...

Still learning

Still growing

Still breaking away from things that no longer serve me

Still trying to love myself - flaws and all

Still trying to be the best version of ME

For some reason, the "New Year, New Me" has struck a nerve with me. You're still YOU. It's assuming that you're broken and need to be fixed. No one is broken. We are all just trying to do this thing called life with the cards we've been dealt.

We all have different experiences, perspectives, and a past that has shaped us into who we are today, leading us to use alcohol as a coping tool. Just because we turned to alcohol doesn't mean that we were broken.

It means...

πŸ‘‰πŸ»we were in pain and didn't know how to handle our emotions without numbing out.

πŸ‘‰πŸ»we didn't know any healthy outlets or were so deep into our habit that it was extremely difficult to get out on our own.

πŸ‘‰πŸ»we were scared of being perceived as weak for reaching out for help.

πŸ‘‰πŸ»we did what we knew at the time just to get from one day to the next to SURVIVE.

Every year is a year to continue on this journey of discovering what people, things, and habits no longer serve me.

A year to keep learning the lessons and get out of the "why me" trap into the "what can I learn from this to take with me into the future" mentality.

Every year gives me an opportunity to grow into who I really am and what I want to get out of this one life I was given, and ultimately the legacy I want to leave behind.

I didn't want my legacy to be known as the girl who drowned her pain in alcohol because she was too scared to deal with her sh*t to reach her true potential.

I didn't want to be lying on my deathbed with the what if's. And I'm so damn happy that I didn't allow alcohol to control me for any longer than it did.

It's not a new me on January 1, 2021; it's a deeper knowing of who I truly and unapologetically am.

Are you ready to get rid of the hold alcohol has over you so you, too, can reach your true potential?

Apply for the 90 Day 1:1 Coaching Program by clicking here.

There's no better time than the start of a new year to rid yourself of a habit that is no longer serving you.

Why I believe setting an intention is better than a resolution. By Alyson Premo.

Why I believe setting an intention is better than a resolution πŸ‘‡πŸ»

According to the dictionary, an intention is a thing intended; an aim, or a plan. Compare that to a resolution, which is a firm decision to do or not to do something.

You can see a resolution is more rigid, which can lead to that all-or-nothing mentality that many of us, especially those who struggle with substances, already have. So that thinking of...

"oh well, I slipped up, so I might as well drink the rest of the week or the month."

"I failed, so I might as well wait until 2023."

All these statements allow you the easy way out and a way to give up. Part of this is because when we set resolutions that are well-intended to improve our lives, we don't have a plan.

Intentions involve planning. So let's take alcohol, for instance. Maybe you say you want to do #dryjanuary. That's all well-intended, but do you have a plan of how you're going to do it?

So often, we say I'm not going to drink, but there are no action steps behind it, leading us to give in more easily. And another big problem is there's no WHY. In any program of mine, we first discuss your why. This is the foundation for every goal you have in life; if you don't have a strong enough reason, you're less likely to commit and follow through.

So if or when you stumble or have a slip-up, you see what you can learn from the lesson. You don't beat yourself up, call yourself a failure, and throw in the towel. You let that slip-up be just that and get back on track the next day because your why is more important than continuing that destructive spiral.

Did you set a New Year's Resolution not to drink but have no plan behind it?

I hate to break it to you, but you're already setting yourself up for failure. Think about it: when you plan and execute the steps in that plan, things actually happen.

If you need a plan to help you with your goal of not drinking, join the Ditch The Drink - 31 Day Challenge starting January 1st!

Click here to set yourself up for success for 2022!

You know you don't have to wait until January 1st to quit drinking, right? By Alyson Premo.

Why do we keep waiting for the "perfect" time?

The beginning of the year.

The beginning of the month.

The beginning of the week.

In reality, the day you decide to stop drinking DOES NOT matter. Maybe it's a psychological aspect to be lumped together with all the New Year's Revolutioners. Feeling like you have to do something worthwhile because everyone else around you is making their resolutions.

I hate to break it to you, but resolutions are pointless. Absolutely pointless. I've broken them. You've broken them, and pretty much every person on this planet has broken them.

Why does this happen?

Because your motivation wanes and your willpower decreases, you're back to your same old patterns by February. Unless you actually COMMIT and surround yourself with others who are on a similar path to hold you accountable and you don't just white knuckle your way through. You actually learn tools you can use and implement ways to change the habit.

I'm not making this stuff up, mamas; it's science. You will not sustain a "resolution" on willpower alone. It just doesn't work. And I bet it's why most of you who have tried to quit alcohol for good just can't seem to get it to click. You're doing it alone, relying on your spouse to hold you accountable, and thinking of alcohol as a treat when it is absolutely not.

Do you know what word I like better than resolution? Intention. I'm going to talk about this more tomorrow, so stay tuned.

In the meantime, if this post resonated with you and you're ready to start today without even waiting for the typical January 1st new year, new me bs, then join the Ditch The Drink - 31 Day Self-Study Challenge.

You can give yourself extra days of living without a toxic substance and a head start being a rebel with all of us other non-drinkers who aren't waking up with a raging hangover, nausea, anxiety through the roof, irritability, and just plain miserable.

Click here for all the deets and join us TODAY!

Wondering how to get this challenge for FREE? Apply for the 90 Day 1:1 Coaching Program. Only ONE spot left for January!

Why don't you drink? By Alyson Premo.

I was DONE letting alcohol control my life and DONE not being the mother my child deserved.

Yesterday and today, I've received more emails/messages from mothers who inquired about the challenge or 1:1 coaching in the past than I ever have in a weekend. What does that tell me? They went back on their word yet again on not drinking during the holiday season.

They said they could do it on their own.

They said their significant other would be their accountability partner.

They said that they weren't "that bad".

They said those things consciously, but subconsciously it all comes down to fear.

Fear of failure.

Fear of the unknown.

Fear of success. (yes, you read that right).

And self-sabotaging back into old behaviors because they don't feel worthy of a life without alcohol.

I see this all the time, and it breaks my heart. Knowing that if they had started when they first reached out two years ago, a year ago, or 6 months ago that they'd be in a different place right now.

If only they told those fears to screw and listened to their gut.

If only they let faith dictate their choices instead of fear.

Don't be this person.

Don't keep waiting when you damn well know waiting is just prolonging the inevitable, and you're missing out on more memories and experiences of this thing called LIFE.

If you don't believe in yourself, I believe in you. And why do I believe in you? Because I was once where you are, and here I am, over 5 years sober with my son hugging me in bed on Christmas night telling me it was the best Christmas ever, and I'm the best mom in the world.

I was DONE letting alcohol control my life and DONE not being the mother my child deserved.

Are you finally done?

If so, apply for the 90 Day 1:1 Coaching Program by clicking here.

OR be on the lookout for the Ditch The Drink - 31 Day Self-Study Challenge opening for registration TOMORROW!

P.S. Things are pivoting in 2022, and that means no more 60 Day Challenge and only TWO spots per month for the 90 Day 1:1 Coaching Program. Don't let this opportunity to work with me pass on by! I've helped thousands of mothers reexamine their relationship with alcohol. Now it's YOUR turn!

The progression of addiction. By Alyson Premo

First, I drank because I wanted to be a rebel.

Later, I drank because it let me loosen up at parties.

Then I drank to relax.

Lastly, I drank because if I didn't, I felt I would die.

This progression didn't happen overnight. It happened over a DECADE. I remember having my first sip of alcohol and absolutely hating the taste, but sneaking it from my parent's liquor cabinet was a high in itself.

Then as time moved on and I went to college, I felt the freedom to do whatever I wanted without my parents having me on a short leash and continuing with that rebel streak and newfound freedom.

I binge drank like most of us. Crazy how we think binge drinking in college is "normal"? Why do we think like that? Because that's what has always been a passage into college and to get the partying out before you get a real job? Who knows.

Then I got a "big girl job" and drank at happy hours or a glass of wine after a day to unwind.

Then in motherhood, I drank because of the overwhelm, and everyone else was doing it, so I might as well.

Lastly, I drank because I was DEPENDENT on alcohol, physically and mentally.

Toward the end of my drinking career, if I didn't have alcohol for more than an hour or two, I would start going through withdrawals. And if I didn't have any alcohol in the house and the liquor store was closed, I would start panicking that I would have a stroke or seizure and die.

What a way to live, huh? The only thing I looked forward to and thought about was alcohol. I was dependent on it to survive. This is why I'm so passionate about telling my story and why I became a Sobriety Coach. I want to plant the seed for you so that you don't get to the point where you are dependent on alcohol.

I'm sure many of you are thinking that'll never happen to me, but I said that too and thought I had it under "control". The scary part is it doesn't happen overnight. It takes years, but one day you're looking back, wishing you had stopped sooner so that it didn't get to that point.

❌ Are you ready to stop this cycle before it gets worse? Because it never gets better.

I have ONE spot left for January for the 90 Day 1:1 Coaching Program, where I take you from barely surviving to thriving without alcohol.

Apply by clicking here!

Trying to be the "perfect mom"? By Alyson Premo

The notion of having to be the "perfect mom" causes us to feel overwhelmed, unworthy, and in constant comparison, which in turn increases the chances we'll drink.

All those emotions that we don't want to feel. All the guilt of not spending enough time with our kids. All the guilt of not being the Pinterest worthy mom. All the guilt of feeling like we just don't have our sh*t together perpetuates the cycle of drinking.

We want all that chatter to go away, so what do we do? We turn to our trusty bottle of wine to take those thoughts away. But they're not gone because you wake up feeling even more guilt for drinking too much the night before.

What a vicious cycle to be in, right?

I hear it all the time, which is why I'm sharing it with you today.

There is no such thing as a perfect mom. Perfect is subjective, so what I think may be "perfect", you may not believe is "perfect," and the next mom might have another definition of perfect. That's why it's important not to get caught up in the pressures society puts on us as mothers.

Also, no one has their sh*t together all the time. Trust me.

You see someone's social media feed and assume everything is rainbows and butterflies by their pretty pictures, but I can guarantee they've struggled or are currently struggling with something. We all are. We may just not throw it out there for the world to see.

Those mamas that show us the mess and chaos are my kind of momsβ€”no need for perfection around here. I can't relate to perfect, but I can relate to messy.

Embrace the mess.

Embrace being the unique version of you.

I know easier said than done because, for many of us, that's why we turned to the bottle to begin with. We don't like who we are. But you have to start somewhere, and removing alcohol from your life is a great place to begin to give you the love you deserve to your mind, body, and soul.

πŸ‘‰πŸ» Are you realizing that your alcohol habit isn't just about the alcohol?

I have TWO spots open for the 90 Day 1:1 Program in January, where we peel and dissect what's really going on so that you can ditch the drinking cycle FOR GOOD!

Apply by clicking here!

Milestones aren't just the consecutive days you're not drinking. By Alyson Premo.

They are the moments where you would've automatically reached for a drink but didn't.

They are the first holidays, first birthdays, first work parties, and all the "firsts" that you never would've done before without alcohol.

They are the pauses.

They are the ways you're learning and growing on this sober journey.

πŸ‘‰πŸ» Milestones are so much more than not drinking.

Instead of wishing that you had consecutive days or years under your belt, start celebrating those moments in life that the past version of you would be proud of.

Because damn mama, there are so many moments you should be celebrating that you're not.

Because you think it isn't a big deal.

❌ It is a big fucking deal, and don't let anyone else or that negative Nancy in your head tell you otherwise.

Imagine if everyone on this planet started to become more aware of themselves in their thoughts, behaviors, and feelings?

Imagine how this world would be a better place for that?

But you're doing it, and by you doing the work, you're showing your kids a better way to respond to life. Because that's the thing, we often react to our circumstances or people instead of responding.

Removing alcohol isn't just about ditching the booze; it's about so much more.

It's undoing years or decades of patterns, which is why milestones aren't just consecutive days. They are moments that you continue to choose differently in EVERY area of your life.

So give yourself the damn credit you deserve!

🀚🏻 Are you beating yourself up for all the things you're doing "wrong" on this journey?

🀚🏻 Are you throwing in the towel as soon as you slip?

🀚🏻 Do you have a hard time celebrating yourself?

🀚🏻 Are you more concerned about the consecutive days than the progress you're making?

These are only a glimpse of what we work on in the 90 Day 1:1 Coaching Program, where I take you from barely surviving to thriving without alcohol.

All my spots for December are filled, but I have TWO spots open for January. And the good news is before we even get started, you'll have Voxer access to me through December for FREE! That's a $497 value for free, so seriously, what are you waiting for?

Apply by clicking here.

Monday mornings without alcohol. By Alyson Premo.

Monday mornings in my drinking days consisted of hangxiety, self-loathing, and wondering how I would make it through another week feeling like garbage.

Now they consist of purpose, intentions, and wondering what good things will come my way this week.

I don't know how I stayed in the drinking cycle for as long as I did.

Seriously, I never felt good unless I was consuming a drink, and after that initial high, it didn't even feel good anymore, but I kept drinking it because no off switch, and why would you drink to only have 1 glass. In my mind, that's utter madness. πŸ˜‚

To live this one life we have on Earth in this miserable cycle, for fucking what?

πŸ‘‰πŸ» A 30-minute reprieve?

πŸ‘‰πŸ» An "escape" from our lives that will still be there when we wake up in the morning?

And this is where it starts to get dangerous when you start drinking to escape and numb feelings; that's red flag territory. I know we've been conditioned to believe that it's "OK" to have a glass or 2 of wine at the end of the day to unwind and relieve the stresses of the day, but does that solve the stressors?

NOPE.

They're still there in the morning.

How about you dissect the actual stressor and come to a resolution? Instead of just putting a bandaid on it.

How about you find a healthy way to unwind? Instead of the false relaxation that alcohol provides.

So instead of drinking my weekend away now and feeling like a sack of sh*t on Monday with thoughts of "Why am I such an idiot? Why do I keep breaking promises to myself?"

Now I'm prepared for the week ahead, and you know what else?

I love having the freedom to be my own boss, create content and programs, and have a deep sense of purpose when I wake up on a Monday because I'm doing what I love and giving back to the world.

So many of us stay stuck in the drinking cycle because we're unhappy with our job and feel like we have to stay in it just to pay the bills. Yes, paying the bills is important, but if you don't love what you do, the chances of this alcohol-free gig sticking decrease.

Are you interested in being a sober coach so that you too can give back AND create an income? Message me (@alysonpremo), and let's chat!

Accepting vs resisting the sober journey. By Alyson Premo.

Accepting that this is a journey to be experienced and not a finite destination where everything is miraculously better is where your power lies.

I'll be transparent in that I wasn't looking for a quick fix to my sobriety because, deep down, I didn't even want to be sober before hitting my personal rock bottom of detox.

But there are other things in life that I wanted a quick fix for - dealing with hard emotions, hitting consistent 5-figure months, and finding the love of my life.

NONE of the above happened overnight, and I don't even have a love of my life yet. I know he's out there, but I'm trusting the timing of how my life is unfolding. It hasn't let me down yet.

We're often looking for that miracle cure to "fix" whatever is going wrong in our lives or to get us to where we want to be, but chances are it's not out there. And why would you want a quick fix anyway? There's no growth in that. There's no learning.

The easy way doesn't allow you to appreciate the journey and all you've done to get to where you desire to be.

What if you started looking at the struggle as a learning experience?

What if you accepted there is no quick fix but only consistent efforts to get you to where you want to be?

If you're fighting and resisting, I can tell you that you're making it a lot harder on yourself than it needs to be.

We've got 28 more days in 2021. How are you going to use that time?

Accepting that there will be some hard days, especially at the beginning? Or resisting and making it as if there's something wrong with you for not being able to ingest a chemically addictive substance in "moderation"?

THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH YOU.

This is what alcohol is set up to do - alter our brain chemistry. That's why the drink responsibly slogan from Big Alcohol is utter bullshit.

Now let go of the fight and watch how much easier it becomes.

In need of support from a certified professional who's over 5 years sober?

I have ONE spot left for the 90 Day 1:1 Program in December.

If you're ready to stop fighting and conquer the hard days without alcohol? Then apply by clicking here.

What is a "normal drinker" any way? By Alyson Premo

Have you ever thought the people who don't drink are the normal ones for not wanting to ingest a poison that kills your mind, body, and soul?

I hear this a lot from 1:1 clients and mothers in the challenges and here on social media. That they just want to be "normal". What does that even mean? Honestly, what does normal mean? Normal to me means following the crowd, doing things that don't fulfill your purpose because you're scared of what others will think, having a 9-5, and getting stuck in the monotony of life.

F*ck normal!! I don't want to be normal. I want to be ME.

πŸ‘‰πŸ» I want to do what lights me up no matter what other people think.

πŸ‘‰πŸ» I want to live with my life with no regrets.

πŸ‘‰πŸ» I want to live my life unapologetic for who I am.

πŸ‘‰πŸ» I want to be on my death bed satisfied and proud of how I lived this one life we have on Earth.

I know now that alcohol wasn't helping me fulfill what I'm here to do. It was slowly killing me.

❌ It was killing my dreams.

❌ It was killing my relationships.

❌ It was killing who I truly am.

I used alcohol to hide and suppress so that I could be perceived as "normal". But have you ever thought the ones who don't drink alcohol are the normal ones for wanting to live their lives fully?

For not wanting to spend their days hungover and crippled with anxiety.

For not wanting to waste this one precious life.

For not wanting to miss moments with their kids.

For not caring what others think of them.

I don't want to be normal. I want to be healthy, fulfilled, and present. I don't want to numb out like everyone else in society is conditioned to do. I've lived that life, and that is not normal. At all.

Are you ready to ditch "normal" for what makes you feel fulfilled? If you said yes, then keep reading.

I (@alysonpremo) have ONE spot left for my 90 Day 1:1 Coaching Program for December! This is THE program to leave mommy wine culture along with the guilt, regret, shame, and hangovers behind FOR GOOD!

Apply by clicking here.

P.S. This is the last chance to work with me in 2021, don't miss it!