Why Mommy Doesn't Drink. By Alyson Premo

Why Mommy Doesn't Drink

1. Because you deserve me at my very best

2. It's a poor example of how to cope with life.

3. It gives me anxiety.

4. It increases my sadness.

5. I don't want to miss any more moments with YOU.

The best thing you can do for your kids is to have a conversation with them about why you don't drink. Tell them how alcohol makes you feel and what it does to you. 

You finding out that alcohol isn't the way to cope with life is the best learning experience you can give to your kids. Maybe they saw you drinking more times than not. Maybe they say your favorite drink is wine. But this is your chance to turn it around. This is your chance to say "mommy made a mistake" or "mommy succumbed to peer pressure," or "mommy didn't know any better, but now she does".

This is how we change the view of alcohol. One person at a time using our story as a means to show others that alcohol isn't all that it's cracked up to be. That you heard alcohol is an acceptable coping mechanism and fell prey to the mommy wine culture, but now you know better. And now you know the actual effects of alcohol on our mind, body, and soul. 

Apologize for things you did under the influence and show them that it's ok to make mistakes. I always say these real-life lessons teach them more than school ever will, and it's the truth.

These are hard conversations to have, but they are important ones. 

Are you ready to give your kids the mother they deserve? Join 39 other mothers and me for the 60 Day Alcohol-Free Challenge starting February 1st! I could tell you all the things that are included, but I won't because it's more than just the content and bonuses.

It's about forming connections with other women at a similar point in their journey. EVERY DAY someone in the challenge is saying how grateful they are to have finally found a place where they can share while being held accountable and gaining insight around why you keep turning to alcohol and what you can do to break out of that pattern. 

Click here or message me (@sobermomcoach) directly with any questions you may have! I hope you'll join us not only for you but for your kids!

P.S. Early bird pricing ends on Friday! Get in before it disappears!

Sobriety isn't a race to see who can improve their life the quickest. By Alyson Premo.

I see this all too often, and I'm guilty of this myself. When we're in the beginning stages of our sobriety, we may compare our lives to those who are farther down the road in their journey. The thoughts of...

👉🏻I'm gaining weight, but all I see are women who have lost weight from being sober.

👉🏻She looks so happy, and I'm miserable.

👉🏻She started her own business, and I can barely attend to the basics of handling the kids and myself.

👉🏻Her skin is glowing, and my face is breaking out like I'm a teenager again.

👉🏻She's sharing her journey with the world, and I haven't even told my friends I had a problem with my drinking.

I'm sure many of you have said a few of these or others when it comes to comparing your day 1 with someone's year 2 or your year 3 with someone else's. But to be frank, you have to stop that sh*t! We all have different circumstances and different levels of how dependent we were on alcohol.

The only thing that matters is YOUR journey. The progress that you're making from one day to the next. Not comparing your progress to someone else's. We don't know their behind the scenes or story just like they don't know yours, so as they would say in school, keep your eyes on your own paper.

Keep striving towards the goals YOU want from becoming sober.

As a reminder, if you've been eyeing the 60 Day Challenge, then get in this week before the EARLY BIRD PRICING disappears. Daily content with audio lessons, daily journal prompts, daily support from me (@sobermomcoach), 4 group coaching calls, a 30-minute 1:1 call with me, and bonuses including the Detox Your Mind Journaling. Mini Course and so much more!

That more being the connections you will make with other mothers at a similar point in their journey. It's about knowing you aren't alone anymore and SHARING your struggles, successes, and the chaos of everyday mom life. I can guarantee that the transformation you will see in yourself at the end of 60 days will be life-changing, but only you can find that out for yourself.

Click here to join or message me (@sobermomcoach) directly!

You are not a bad mom for your past mistakes. By Alyson Premo.

You are not a bad mom for:

your past mistakes

things you did while under the influence of alcohol

using alcohol to cope when that was the only way you knew how

your participation in mommy wine culture

Someone in the sobriety community posted a TikTok video that went viral of a mom pouring vodka into her coffee cup with juice in it while her baby was crying in the background.

Since yesterday I haven't been able to stop thinking about this video for a few reasons.

👉🏻That mother was clearly hurting on the inside, and here someone is blasting her and her CHILD on her personal page for being a bad mother.

👉🏻Instead of shaming the woman for her own personal agenda, did she think about personally reaching out to her? Nope.

👉🏻We don't create change with shame. We create change with compassion and being the example.

Think about how hard it was for you to change your drinking habits.

I'm sure some of you had people telling you that you needed to "slow down" or quit altogether. I'm sure you talked yourself into moderation more times than not before you finally had your aha moment.

So what makes you think, forcing someone to stop drinking is going to work? What makes you think publicly humiliating them is going to make them quit?

I got news for you. It won't.

But I know what it will do. It'll make them feel even worse about themselves, right? It'll reinforce that there is something wrong with them for not being able to quit. It'll reinforce that maybe those thoughts of being a bad mom are true.

Over the course of my journey, my shame and anger have turned into compassion. I think there's a fine line between holding someone accountable and flat out shaming them. Shame doesn't create change.

I'm here to lead by example and offer support. Sure, do I think some companies need to be held accountable for the way they promote mommy wine culture? Of course. But let's try our best not to attack individuals who don't know any better right now. We were all there once, too, so let's lead with compassion instead.

We talked about the anger we have towards mommy wine culture in our group coaching call included within the 60 Day Alcohol-Free Challenge yesterday. If you're struggling, I encourage you to take a look and see if the challenge would be a good fit for you. I can guarantee it will be, but I'm biased, so take a look at what others have said about the challenge by clicking here or message me (@sobermomcoach)!

Your children aren't your excuse to drink. They're your reason NOT to. By Alyson Premo.

The mommy needs alcohol to parent narrative is utter nonsense and quite frankly ignorant and dangerous.

Yes, parenting is hard. Maybe one of the hardest things we'll ever do in our lives. But it is not an excuse to run to a toxic substance, check out, and potentially put our kids in harm's way.

I say this with the utmost compassion, and there is no shame EVER in this space. We already have enough of that from our drinking days, but it's the truth. Our kids are watching us, and they are absorbing their surroundings more than you think.

By the time they are 7 or 8 years old, they have a solid foundation of beliefs based on all the programming from people in their life. These beliefs get stored in their subconscious, so they react based on childhood experiences later in life.

It's clear from stories I hear from 1:1 clients and challenge participants that their mother or father's drinking impacted their own drinking behavior. It also affected how they view themselves. It's not impossible to change those deep-rooted thoughts, but it is hard work.

Our parents said or did things in our childhood that we would never realize impacted us, but now we're spending our adult life trying to rid ourselves of those beliefs. I wish schools stressed the importance of a developing child's brain and how we nurture them, speak to them, and raise them would impact them into adulthood.

Not only that, but we are teaching our kids to cope with life by running to alcohol. How sad is that? No matter what memes you see or what your friends and family say. IT IS NOT NORMAL. Let's teach our kids healthy ways to cope so that they have a better chance of not running to alcohol.

Whether you want to believe it or not, alcohol impacts the relationship you have with your kids. The longer you wait, the harder it is on you and them. Stop waiting and join us for the 60 Day Alcohol-Free Challenge! Registration is NOW OPEN. The first (5) who register will receive a FREE copy of We Are The Luckiest by Laura McKowen and a journal to get you in the alcohol-free mindset BEFORE we even begin. EARLY BIRD PRICING ends 1/22 at 11:59 pm EST. Click here to grab your spot!

P.S. Only 40 spots are available!

All you have to do is not drink today; that's it. By Alyson Premo.

Seems simple, right? It is pretty simple when you think about it, BUT it is not easy.

We tend to overcomplicate things and think about future holidays or social situations or the daunting "forever" word when all it is is focusing on not drinking TODAY. That's it. That's all of us are guaranteed in life anyway. So why focus on the what-ifs when we're not even there yet?

So let this serve as your reminder today to focus on the 24 hours you have ahead of you.

🔸Not this weekend.

🔸Not Valentine's Day next month.

🔸Not the Summer.

🔸Not any day except today.

With that said, quitting drinking isn't easy because it's more than not just picking up a drink

👉🏻It is unlearning a coping mechanism you've relied on for years or even decades.

👉🏻It is rewiring your brain.

👉🏻It is becoming conscious of why you turn to alcohol.

👉🏻It is becoming aware of your triggers.

👉🏻It is dealing with trauma or experiences from the past.

👉🏻It is being patient.

The real work begins when you stop drinking and realize that you drank to numb out from everyday life and what you will do without your crutch now.

You drank because...

🔸your spouse annoys you.

🔸your kids won't give you 5 minutes of uninterrupted time to just be.

🔸everyone around you is.

🔸you're sabotaging yourself.

This list could go on and on, but these are pretty common reasons. I hear it ALL THE TIME. Yes, those reasons are valid but grabbing for that glass of wine is the easy way out. You're letting yourself get sucked in and stuck in that same cycle. You're not even giving yourself a chance to choose a different outcome.

The way to give yourself a chance is by choosing differently and by becoming AWARE. Awareness is the first step to change. In order to change our patterns and behaviors., we have to become conscious of them first.

We talk about how to do this and so much more in the 60 Day Alcohol-Free Challenge. Registration and early bird pricing will be opening up this week, so if you've missed out in the past and want to join, then get on the waitlist by clicking here!

P.S. Only 40 spots are available!

During times of chaos and uncertainty, protecting your sobriety is even more crucial. By Alyson Premo.

During times of chaos and uncertainty, protecting your sobriety is even more crucial.

👉🏻Turn off the news.

👉🏻Limit your time on social media.

👉🏻Curate your social media feed to those accounts that don't cause anxiety and doom and gloom.

👉🏻Don't let others make you feel guilty for not getting involved in the chaos.

I know that we're in a tumultuous time for many reasons. It's easier to cancel #dryjanuary because times are tough. But not going to alcohol right now is where your power is. Sure, the health benefits of being alcohol-free are amazing, but staying with the uncomfortable and not going to your crutch to make you feel better is where the real growth and behavior change lies.

At the same time, do not feel like you have to get involved in what is happening around us. You have to put your sobriety first at all times. If you're a newbie on this sober journey, then I'm talking to you. Even us "vets" of sobriety found it hard in 2020, and that's with healthy coping mechanisms that have been in place for YEARS, not days or months.

I always come back to we can only control ourselves, and sometimes that means putting ourselves in a little bubble, and that is OK.

Remember, this too shall pass, and you'll be stronger because of it.

Did you know that I (@sobermomcoach) have a 30 Day Alcohol-Free Journaling Mini-Course called Detox Your Mind? This is perfect for those of you who aren't quite ready to invest in the 60 Day Alcohol-Free Challenge but want a way to jumpstart your journey and figure out what's really going on with all those jumbled thoughts in your head.

Journaling has become one of my top tools on this journey. It wasn't always that way, but the more time I spent taking pen to paper, the more I realized how beneficial and therapeutic journaling is. That's exactly why I created this for you!

P.S. If you want to be the first to know when the 60 Day Alcohol-Free Challenge re-opens, then click here to get on the waitlist. The first 5 who register always receive a special bonus, so make sure you're on the waitlist if you want that bonus.

Why is alcohol still a socially acceptable coping mechanism? By Alyson Premo

Society has conditioned us to believe that alcohol is an acceptable coping mechanism. Then when someone begins to get out of control with their drinking or endure serious negative consequences, we shun them.

How does this make sense? It doesn't.

Everywhere you turn, there are memes, advertising, and your family/friends telling you to have a glass of wine to relax or to deal with your kids. 🙄

BUT it's only to an acceptable degree. Like it's ok to drink a few glasses of wine a night and act like a "lady", but the minute you reveal you're an alcoholic or got a DUI, then some people will treat you differently and view you as less than. Or that somehow there's something morally wrong with you.

ADDICTION IS NOT A MORAL FAILURE.

We got so wrapped up in alcohol being ok to use as a way to deal with life that we forget that alcohol is a drug. Alcohol is an addictive substance. Period.

I genuinely believe to change the conversation, we have to stop looking at alcohol as a coping mechanism. I'm not a prohibitionist whatsoever, but when we keep pushing the narrative that alcohol is a socially acceptable coping mechanism when it's not, we are harming people in the process. We're taught that alcohol is this innocent substance because it's glamorized everywhere we turn, and drinking is a passage into adulthood, but it is killing people, destroying families, and keeping you complacent and content just going through the daily motions of life

Essentially we're being conditioned to run away from our problems. Keep drinking them away until you have no choice to finally deal with them. But you lost all that time justifying your drinking and running away, and you look back with regret and guilt. Then you're not only dealing with the real issues of why you drank but all the other consequences of your drinking too.

Do not let alcohol get you stuck in a cycle of never dealing with the real issue issues or dragging the process out longer than it needs to. It is not worth it!

All 3 spots have been filled for the 30 Day 1:1 Program (Bye Bye Booze...Hello Freedom!), but I'm opening up ONE more spot to a mother who is serious about committing to an alcohol-free lifestyle. Message me (@sobermomcoach) to see if this program would be a good fit for you!

Forgive yourself for using alcohol to cope when that was the only way you knew how. By Alyson Premo.

Say it with me.

"I forgive myself for using alcohol to cope with motherhood because, at the time, that was the only way I knew how."

As mothers, we are so hard on ourselves, from not having the cleanest house to feeling like a failure as a mom because our kids aren't behaving to feeling guilty using alcohol as our crutch in motherhood.

Most of the time, we drink because we let that guilt of not being "perfect" get to us, and all we want to do is numb out. Then we remove alcohol; we're left with all these feelings that we can't escape anymore.

One of the most common is feeling like a bad mom for drinking and all the things you did while under the influence.

👉🏻Feeling like a bad mom for not being present during our kid's youngest years.

👉🏻Feeling like a bad mom for missing out on specific events and significant milestones in our kids' lives.

The second time I tried to get sober, my son had to miss his kindergarten graduation. I felt horrible then and felt even more awful when I finally got sober once and for all a year later and had to relive that moment. I had to forgive myself for that moment because if I didn't, it would eat me alive, and I wouldn't be able to enjoy the sober life I have now with my son.

Those moments needed to happen to get to where I am today, and at the time, alcohol was the only way I knew how to cope with grief, overwhelm, and low self-worth. Now that I know better, I do better, and that's all I can do. Beating myself up for things that happened in the past isn't going to help. In fact, for some people, it leads them to want to drink again, so forgive your past self for not knowing better and do better today.

These are the kinds of topics we dig deeper into in my (@sobermomcoach) 30 Day 1:1 Program (Bye, Bye Booze...Hello Freedom!). This program is for those who do better in a 1:1 setting because they want a safe space to be seen and heard without flying under the radar. They want to be held accountable and get to the underlying issues of why they drink in the first place so that they can handle their triggers head-on and make a plan to overcome them.

I have THREE spots open for January so message me (@sobermomcoach) to see if it would be a good fit for you!

Nothing better than starting a new year off without a hangover. By Alyson Premo.

Nothing better than starting a year off without a hangover and without spending the first day of the year hating yourself for getting so drunk.

Who else is spending January 1, 2021, hangover free? 🖐🏻

Do you ever look back and wonder how you're still alive today? Because same.

Those mornings where...

I woke up in bed wondering how much I drank,

I grabbed my phone, wondering if I sent something to someone that I'd regret,

I wondered how I was even going to make it through the day with a headache and a queasy stomach,

I woke up with crippling anxiety,

I woke up hating myself yet again for not being able to "control" my alcohol intake.

Screw all that noise. Honestly, I don't know how I lived like that for so long—what a miserable existence. Sure, every time wasn't miserable, and there were times I didn't drink to excess, but most of the time after I drank, I was a waste of space, wondering when the hangxiety would go away, and hating myself.

Once you see how great being hangover free for days, weeks, and years is, there is no way you would ever want to go back to drinking ever again.

Are you ready to experience what life is like without waking up in the morning with a hangover from hell? TODAY is the last day to get into the group for the 60 Day Alcohol-Free Challenge. We started today, and I can already tell these ladies are committed and ready to help one another through this. You can't do this alone. You can't do anything in life alone, so trust me when I say finding a support system of mothers who are all having the same fears, thoughts, and emotions when it comes to being alcohol-free will help you tenfold in healing, moving forward, and ditching alcohol once and for all. The link is in our bio to get in NOW and receive your first audio lesson, journal prompt, and piece of content for the day. I can't wait to get to know you!

P.S. Doors close TODAY (1/1) at 11:59 pm EST.

P.P.S. If you're interested in the 3 payment plan option, click here.

We did it! Happy Alcohol-Free New Year's Eve! By Alyson Premo

To all you mothers who attempted to be alcohol-free or stayed sober through one of the most chaotic years of our lifetime, you deserve all the credit in the world.

I am so proud of you!

To say this year has been a doozy would be an understatement. But through all the mess, we made it. We did it by doing the next right thing, by taking one step forward even if that meant taking a few steps back.

WE DID IT!

I am so incredibly proud of all of you who remained sober during this year.

Cheers to a safe and Alcohol-Free NYE! 🥂🎉

(That's Martinelli's sparkling cider in that flute) 😉

Xo,

Alyson (@alysonpremo)

TODAY IS THE LAST DAY TO JOIN THE 60 DAY ALCOHOL-FREE CHALLENGE! If you tried your best to get and stay alcohol-free during 2020 but just couldn't get it to stick, I encourage you to join us. Daily content with audio lessons, daily accountability check-ins, daily support from me (@sobermomcoach), 4 LIVE Group Coaching Calls, a 1:1 30 minute call with me, and so many bonuses, including an Alcohol-Free Workbook AND the Detox Your Mind - 30 Day Alcohol-Free Journaling Mini-Course for FREE!

The truth is I could tell you all the bells and whistles, but it's about so much more than what's included in the challenge. It's about the connections you will make, the realization that you aren't alone in your struggle, and a way to finally get you past your roadblocks so that you can see how powerful and capable you are.

We are there to be a listening ear through the struggles and to cheer you on when you accomplish yet another win on this alcohol-free journey. All the wins are important and should be celebrated. No feat is too small, so I hope you'll join us so we too can celebrate all your wins TOGETHER!

P.S. Doors close tomorrow, 1/1, at 11:59 pm EST! Don't miss out!

P.P.S. Who's committing to NOT drink with me today? Let me see those hands! 🤚🏻