If some of you don't know myself and a few other bigger sober pages got called out over the weekend for me, specifically using the word "tribe" for Sober Mom Tribe, then they came to my defense.
This all started on Friday night when a woman (I won't even call out her name because that's what she wants - attention) started commenting on other people's posts that tribe is insensitive and offensive to Native American and Indigenous populations. Yes, literally going on other people's pages and posts and commenting the same thing. Like copy and paste, then she moves onto someone else's page. This behavior is flat out crazy. Let's take a step back here and the why. Why did she feel the need to do that? She said she was fighting for the Native American population. No, you're fighting your own agenda. This isn't about them; it's about YOU.
I get it. I've had some pushback on tribe in the past. My stance will always be that I won't be changing the name because the definition of a tribe is a group of people, or a community with similar values or interests, a group with a common ancestor, or a common leader. Words are just that words. If you find this insensitive or offensive to Native American or Indigenous people, then that is your right, but I and many others agree that it isn't. You can choose to look at the word, or you can choose to look at the group of mothers who are coming together to not feel so alone in an alcohol-soaked world. Mothers who are grateful for the support, connection, and celebration of being alcohol-free.
The way that some of you have banded together to bully me into changing the name is disgusting. I've never been so disgusted with this mean girl mentality that I've seen lately in the sober community. So if someone doesn't agree with you and has numerous reasons why they don't, then you will call them out, threaten their livelihood, and get others to harass them.
Do you know that there is a real person behind the Instagram account? A real single mother who battled her own demons and is in recovery herself. My sobriety isn't a fucking trend. My sobriety is life or death. But now, since sobriety is trending, we have these women who make accounts for validation and want to get a big following. Just because you have a platform doesn't give you a right to belittle people who don't agree with you. Since when did sobriety and recovery equate to being social justice warriors?
I am here for sobriety and recovery. I am here to provide a community for mothers who want to remove alcohol from their life for various reasons. I AM NOT here to be an activist, and that is ok. I do not want to do it all, nor can I.
This is me, and you can take it or leave it. I will not be bullied into doing what is right for my community and me, especially when there is no harm being done. It's actually the exact opposite, and I feel that's why they are so triggered. There's another specific mother's recovery page that uses tribe too, but they only have 900 or so followers compared to Sober Mom Tribe, which almost has 32,000 followers. They didn't call them out, though. Sounds a little fishy to me, huh?
People who have what you want will try to take you down, but newsflash you can't take down a woman who's been through hell. This is nothing compared to my active addiction days. But it has also opened up my eyes to why I put my blinders on. I'm here to help and inspire others, make some money so my child and I can live, follow those whose values align with mine, and for the memes. I'm always here for the memes because if you can't laugh, then there's no point in living. Social media is a shit show, so I try to focus on the tasks at hand and call it a day. Does that always happen? No. Sometimes I go down the rabbit hole, but for my own sanity, unplugging is needed.
One last thing before I wrap this up. I've recently left a Sober Mastermind of sorts that got together every other Sunday because I no longer want to be surrounded by individuals who harm others in the name of social justice. When what it really is is using a social justice issue to justify their mean girl behavior. I've always had so much love for the sober community, but lately, this community that I've grown to love has become full of virtue signaling sobriety trendsters. (I think I just made up the word trendster, but I'm going to roll with it.) Don't get me wrong many in the sober community are amazing people and are respectful in how they approach these types of situations, but some are using their sobriety only for validation.
I have two business mentors who I admire the fuck out of, and they are unapologetic for who they are and what they stand for. I am not a cookie-cutter sobriety trendster. I am Alyson Premo. A mom. A grateful recovering alcoholic. A woman who was put on this Earth to help others who are struggling. A woman who is proud to be the leader of Sober Mom Tribe. And that is good enough for me.